How to Talk Dirty in Bed An Expert Guide to Dirty Talk

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To do so, you could say something like, “Remember when you bent me over the couch the other week? I was dripping wet.” Dr. Tara particularly recommends this method as a means of sexting, too. Once you’re ready to try this with your partner, Cordingley recommends keeping the lights off or at a dim level, which may make you feel a little less exposed and inhibited. Start with small tidbits of feedback, says O’Reilly—a simple “don’t stop” or “that feels so fucking good” can go a long way. Still, she stresses that the benefits outweigh the risks here. Sexy talk is also one of the best ways to make your partner feel sexy, and to turn him or her on—not just during nighttime play but in every part of their lives.

  • This doesn’t mean that some men don’t prefer really bawdy women, but don’t think that you have to be really outlandish to get his attention.
  • But that doesn’t mean you can just say anything that pops into your head.
  • If you’re feeling this resistance, you need to intentionally set up a safe container for dirty talk with your partner before you begin actually exploring it.
  • Before you know it, you’ll be a dirty talk pro.

WORLD LANGUAGES

  • In addition to verbal cues, she also highly recommends that people be on the lookout for non-verbal cues too, as these can be vital to gauge the comfort levels of someone.
  • You can’t just talk dirty to a man without knowing the psychology behind why it needs to be done.
  • So it’s hard for you to ever go wrong by making sounds of any sort.
  • That’s why I’m going to [insert sexual activity] when you get home.
  • You can use explicit language and special words to build up to more and more intimate moments.
  • Dirty talk is all about expressing your erotic desires, kinks, and fantasies.

This is especially crucial if your partner is a woman. Women, in particular, are often aroused through the imagination. This is why erotic books like 50 Shades of Gray are infamous smash hits among female readers. Meanwhile, guys are dominating porn usage because their arousal has more directly visual triggers. A good rule of thumb with dirty talk is to tell your partner what you want to do to them/with them before you’re actually doing it, and then, while you’re doing it, specifically describe what it is you like about it. In the bedroom, when someone says “Talk dirty to me baby…” the hopefully-soon-to-be dirty talker suddenly freezes up like a soaking wet roll of toilet paper thrown out of an igloo in Antartica.

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“I love how you taste.”

You can use dirty talk any time of the day whether she’s next to you or at work. It just takes the right words to excite her or send her over the edge, and we have you covered with the best dirty talk phrases to say to her. And once you’re warmed up and in the dirty talking mindset, let yourself really start having fun by improvising your own lines. This one stage is where dirty talking is the most powerful.

And in this context, the commands can come across as an arousing kind of dominance. Goodreads has an “Erotica for Men” reading list with more than 100 books. Rachel Wright, MA, LMFT, recommends using your senses to describe what you’re feeling, seeing, smelling, tasting, and hearing.

Tongue-tied in the bedroom and scared to cross a line? We have tips and tricks for turning your partner on without saying the wrong thing. Dirty talk is all about getting the other person to feel aroused, excited, and wanted and to say, “Yes, I want it more.”

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